The gift hidden in ''No''

Dear reader,

it's a thorn wrapped gift but it's worth the prick

Once upon a time, I sat my little delusional mind down, pulled out colourful pens and pretty paper, had my girlfriends at the time contribute relevant stickers of hearts and flowers and I wrote my first - and last- love letter. I wrote it to Stephen (not his real name). I was eleven and the world was all pink and Disney was real life, and nothing could ever go wrong as long as I was in love (or what I thought love was) and sure about it. I was excited and eager... I was just a girl who'd discovered the power of cursive.

Two things went wrong that day.

1. As soon as Stephen read it, a teacher - his class teacher actually- appeared like it was his letter Stephen was reading and confiscated the very well signed letter, so everyone knew it was from me. (My friend tried to convince him to swallow it... he didn't)

2. Stephen didn't like my beautiful letter. He didn't reciprocate my feelings. I wasn't just rejected; I lost the best friendship I had at that time.

I wasn’t scared about being caught. I handled that part like a pro. But the rejection? That stung. My little heart spiralled into a quiet sadness that lasted for nearly two years. I didn’t understand then what I do now:

rejection isn’t just a closed door—it’s often a redirection. A form of protection.

That wasn't the last rejection I faced, there was a whole lot more from schools and other people, and opportunities I thought were fit for me. You've probably also faced a whole lot of rejection and you're at the edge and you've had it with being told no. You probably have had moments where you blamed yourself because it didn't make sense that you got told ''no'' that many times and you weren't the problem.

But one thing you should know is that rejection just means that the other person failed to notice what you have to offer.

💔 Rejection Hurts—But It’s Not the End

Rejection feels personal. It feels like someone looked at your soul and said, “No thanks.” But more often than not, it’s not about you—it’s about timing, compatibility, or someone else’s capacity to receive what you offer.

And here’s the truth: Rejection doesn’t define your worth. It reveals what’s not meant for you.

🌱 Grace in the Face of No

To take rejection with grace is to resist the urge to shrink. It’s choosing dignity over bitterness. It’s saying, “I showed up. I was brave. And even though it didn’t go the way I hoped, I’m proud of myself.”

Grace means:

• Not begging for validation

• Not turning cold or cynical

• Not pretending you didn’t care

It means allowing yourself to feel, then letting go without losing yourself in the process.

🛡️ Rejection as Protection

Sometimes, the things we chase would have broken us if we’d caught them.

That friendship I lost?

It taught me boundaries.

That love letter?

It taught me courage.

And the silence that followed?

It taught me how to listen to myself.

It took time, it was painful but as soon as I got over it and picked myself up and redefined my worth, things got clearer.

Rejection protects us from:

• Relationships that aren’t mutual

• Opportunities that aren’t aligned

• Situations that would stunt our growth

It’s not punishment—it’s pruning.

So, you were bold, you were forward, and you shot your shot. That in itself is worth an applause. However, your effort was rewarded by rejection. It would be impractical to not feel hurt by it so here's what you're going to do, feel the sting of the no but don't wallow in it too long. Remind yourself that when it's for you, you won't need to yell to advertise your worth. You're not alone, you're not broken, you're not the problem. You're being rerouted to something better, something more beautiful.

Through the rejection, you've learnt to be brave, to be honest, to be resilient. You may not have gotten the yes you hoped for, but you learnt a lesson in self-worth, setting boundaries and letting go.

love,

Me <3

P.S.: It gets better and love, the real kind, always wins